The first day.
"Let's go to the mall." my dad said. "Ooo, what for? I asked. "Since the old computer broke, we have to look for a new computer." He answered. "Fine with me." my mom sighed. As we got into the car we started talking about what computer we each wanted. "I want a PC, for sure." my mom said with an air that plainly said she though she was right. "Well, I think we should get a Microsoft computer." My dad said with his voice that he used to get his way. "No, we should totally get a MacBook!" I told my parents "No, definitely not." My parents said together. "Why can't we have a MacBook?" I asked. "Because it costs to much and is too small." My parents answered. After this conversation ended, my dad pulled up into the parking lot. "Hurry, hurry." my mom said while rushing us. "We walked into the huge red, green, blue, and yellow Microsoft store. My mom and I started looking around and found a small tablet. We sat down to look and play with it. My dad found a worker whose name was Joseph. "Hello, how can I help you." Joseph asked. "Hello, well I'm looking for a new computer." My dad told him.
ANIA U made this comment
ReplyDeleteNice story! It clearly states what you did that day and the details make it come to life.
But, the ending of this needs a little work - I don;t want to be left with a confusing, not-understandable conclusion. Cool new computer, anyway.
I love how you added a lot of detail about everything great job!
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